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Homosexuality and the Church – A Different Take on the Conservative Perspective

* The opening picture is a postcard that was anonymously sent to Post Secret http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PostSecret.

Apologies

Let me start off by saying that many of you with same-sex attraction have suffered terrible persecutions and self-righteous judgments from those who claim to represent a God who loves us so much that he would sacrifice his Son to rescue us. As one pastor has put it, "you ain't been hurt 'til you been hurt by church folk."

So, on behalf of those of us who have persecuted people with same-sex attraction (and therefore miserably failed to properly represent the loving God we claim to serve), I apologize for our self-righteousness, hatred, and prejudice, and violence. God loves you just as much as every other person made in His image, even if we fail to show it:

God is "not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance," "for God so loved [every single person in the world] that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life, for God [didn't send] his Son into the world to condemn [it], but that the [every person in the world], through him, might be saved" (John 3:16-17, 2 Peter 3:9)  

And to those who have committed such persecutions: you are focusing on the wrong thing. Curtailing outward action is not the intent of Christianity: our beliefs center around a God who has the power and authority to redeem this world from the inside, out. Everything starts with our hearts; go back and read the opening quote, then go and look at the whole/rest of the person, not just their sexual preferences. And no, people with same-sex attraction can't "just change their mind"; something that entrenched in the soul is not altered with the ease of flipping a light switch.

Just as Jesus knew that, when the woman was caught in adultery, the intent of the men was to judge her themselves, and not let God judge her (John 8:1-11) you are not to judge anyone yourself, only warn them of God's judgment in a loving way:

And as he reasoned of righteousness, temperance, and judgment to come... Acts 24:25

"By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love [for one] another." John 13:35

Foreword

People are not usually thrilled at the idea of someone wanting to change major aspects of who they are, especially if those same aspects make up major portions of that person's self-image. The claim that same-sex attraction is "natural" and, therefore, not immoral, does not hold any weight in the eyes of a moral God who knows that, to any sinner (for those who don't know, that's every person who's ever lived), committing sin is 100% natural. Two examples come to mind:

1. A heterosexual, hormone-raging teenage boy looking lustfully at a woman. Jesus plainly opened the intent of the law against adultery when, in Matthew 5:28 he said, "whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart." Therefore, the "natural" desire to be with a woman, when incorrectly indulged upon in the heart, is adultery, and therefore immoral.

1. Children having to be taught how to share things. Every person is "naturally" selfish. However, despite how "natural" that selfishness is, its "naturalness" doesn't automatically make it moral: "Let no man seek his own (welfare), but every man (should seek) [the welfare of others]" 1 Corinthians 10:

As Christians, we should not (and cannot) hold to the thinking of the world:

And be not conformed to this world, but be you renewed by the transforming of your mind... Romans 12:2

Our identity/definition of self does not come from our desires (however "natural" they may be to us), but comes from our relation to God:

Thus says the LORD, "Let not the wise man [rejoice] in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man [rejoice] in his might; let not the rich man [rejoice] in his riches, but let him that [rejoices rejoice] in this: that he knows and understands me, that I am the LORD..." Jeremiah 9:23-24

This is especially important in light of Christ's command to deny – and even die, in a self-sacrificing manner – to our natural desires, no matter how right they may seem:

"Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it." Matthew 16:24-25

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. Romans 12:1

We walk by faith, not by sight (or even feelings, for that matter), because it is easy to be deceived by our own hearts without God's word working in us:

For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? Jeremiah 17:9

For this cause also thank we God without ceasing, because, when you received the word of God which you heard of us, you received it not as the word of men, but as it is in truth: the word of God, which effectually works also in you that believe. 1 Thessalonians 2:13 530

A Non-Comprehensive Reasoning Against Actively Pursuing Same-Sex Relationships

Point #1: When God created Adam and Eve, Adam's proclamation was that "a man shall leave his father and mother" -- not his two fathers or his two mothers -- "and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh" Genesis 2:24

The original design was for two complimentary and distinct sexual entities -- male and female -- to be together.

In Ephesians 5:22-33, Paul takes this original design a step further by explaining how the husband and wife are supposed to spiritually relate to each other, which also depicts the deeper spiritual reality of how Christ relates to the church:

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he (Christ) is the savior of the body (the Church). Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be (subject) to their own husbands in every thing.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word – that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish – so ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself, for no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord (nourishes and cherishes) the church: for we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh." This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and (let) the wife see that she [respect] her husband. Ephesians 5:22-33

This is simply not possible if both partners in the relationship are of the same gender. Nowhere above is there any mention of even the possibility of a same-sex union in this manner.

Point #2: God designed human beings to procreate, which is not possible for same-sex couples to accomplish on their own. The very first command given to Adam in the Garden of Eden was to "be fruitful, multiply, and replenish the Earth" (Genesis 1:28 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=gen%201:28;&version=9;).

Again, with same-sex couples, this command cannot be completely obeyed.

Restoration Is Available

This, of course, will eventually lead to the issue of I experience same-sex attraction; what do I do? That answer is more complex that can be answered in a blog, but what has come to mind is the following:

Delight yourself also in the LORD, and he shall give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

This is two-fold, in that God not only (1) places the desires in our hearts, but also (2) brings those desires to fulfillment as well. (Note: holiness is a prerequisite of the aforementioned verse;see the next point.)

How does this happen?

Know you not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind... shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you: but you are washed, but you are sanctified, but you are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. 1 Corinthians 6:9-11

"And such were some of you," as in past tense. It takes being washed, sanctified, and justified to do this, "for it is God who works in you, both to desireand to do his good pleasure," because "with his stripes we are healed" (Philippians 2:13, Isaiah 53:5

1. Now, someone will surely say, "Do you know anyone who has been "healed" of same-sex attraction?" No, I don't.

I don't know anyone who has been raised from the dead, either, but that does not prevent me from acknowledging that my God can accomplish both, "for with God, nothing shall be impossible" Luke 1:37

Additional Resources

1. What Does the Bible Teach about Homosexuality?  a free online video interview with Dr. Robert Gagnon
2. Scriptural Perspectives on Homosexuality and Sexual Identity by Dr. Gagnon.
3. "Lost Among Men: A Non-Political View of Homosexuality" -- chapter 7 from Healing the Masculine Soul
4.  The Bible and Homosexual Practice
5. Love, the Bible, and Homosexual Practice Dr. Gagnon's DVD series on homosexuality.
6. Set Free Ministries, a local ministry to those with same-sex attraction.